


Always.

by thelayuplesbian



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Hopeful Ending, M/M, My heart hurt writing this, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, probably
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-07
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2020-01-06 07:48:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18384095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelayuplesbian/pseuds/thelayuplesbian
Summary: Bucky was always there.





	Always.

**Author's Note:**

> basically the endgame trailers WRECKED ME and I want them to be fucking HAPPY OKAY SEEING STEVE CRY HURT ME

Sometimes Steve thought he was going crazy. Maybe he was. Maybe he did a long time ago. Maybe everything has finally broken him down too much. He misses Bucky, he misses him so much and so bad it feels like a piece of him is gone. He’s lost Bucky too many times to count and it hurt, it always hurt. 

“I feel him,” he tells Natasha one day, she just holds his hand. “It’s like-“ his voice breaks. “It’s like he’s right there but I can’t, I can’t touch him.” He cries, it seems like he cries a lot anymore. Steve couldn’t cry for days after, he just moved on autopilot. It was like he wasn’t really there. 

Thing is Bucky  _was_ there, he was always there. The soul world is aggravating, so incredibly frustrating. It was like everything was toned down, tinted orange and he could see the world. He could see Steve, watched him, tried to hard to reach out and touch him, hold him, anything to let him know he’s there. He couldn’t, he never could. Sam wanders, speaks to someone named Riley, someone who isn’t there. Sometimes though, sometimes he sits with Bucky and checks on Steve. 

One day it becomes too much, Bucky breaks and he starts yelling. Screaming, hoping his Stevie can hear him. “Stevie,” It’s a whisper, a teary eyed whisper. Steve is punching a bag during this, taking out his anger and he- he stops and he looks straight at Bucky. “Buck?” He isn’t looking at him anymore, Bucky gets up, tries to hold his hand. “I’m here Stevie, I’m always here.” He doesn’t know why but he tries to touch him again, just a hand on his cheek like he always wanted to. Bucky can feel the heat from Steve, can feel the softness of his cheek and he gasps. Steve can’t feel him though. 

Bucky doesn’t know how he always finds Steve, but he does. So he doesn’t worry when he goes somewhere else for a bit. Stephen, or Doctor Strange, is almost always found at the sanctum or the hospital he used to work at. So he walks down to the sanctum, nearly walks through Wong and finds Stephen staring at a glass door with snow behind it. “James.” He greets, Bucky chuckles and sits next to him. They sit in silence for a while, watching the snow fall. 

“I felt Steve,” he says after a while. “I wanted- I wanted to hold him and I tried to touch his face. He couldn’t feel it but he knew I was there.” Stephen looks at him and smiles gently. “They’ll figure it out soon. Tony’s almost home.” They sit for a while longer. The snow reminds him of the ice, it’s comforting in a way. He hates what happened but somehow he’s grateful it did. The solider haunts him still, it always will but he wouldn’t have been there if not for the serum and the ice. Leaving Steve here all alone was a thought he couldn’t bear. 

Sure enough, Tony comes home. A blue rock man, a blue robot woman and a woman soldier are all with him. The spider boy from the airport is there and people he’s never seen before, all stuck like him. Bucky doesn’t fully see what happens but Clint shows up, a blonde woman named Carol and Scott come too. There’s a fight, the people in his world try to help but they can’t, they can only watch. It comes down to the team against only Thanos and Steve, he steps forward. Thor and Carol are nowhere to be seen. Steve talks but it’s muffled to Bucky. There’s light, a storm and an axe. The body collapses, the head rolls away. 

They find the stones, Wong, Carol and Thor do something and Bucky feels something in the pit of his stomach. He looks at Peter, the kid has wide eyes and is staring at his hand, it’s starting to become as bright as the people they left behind, atom by atom. It feels like he’s thrust forward and he can’t help but fall to his hands and knees. Bucky doesn’t register everyone else coming back, he focuses on how he can feel the ground and looks up. He looks up and he sees Steve, he sees him drop his weapons, pull off his helmet and run to Bucky. 

Steve falls to the ground in front of him and his hands find Steve’s face again. “Stevie-“ he starts but he’s cut off, he’s being pulled in and oh. Steve is kissing him. He can’t help but melt into it, feels tears falling and doesn’t care, he grips as hard as he can onto Steve’s suit. “You were there,” Steve whispers when they break apart slightly, foreheads touching. “I was always right there.” Steve smiles gently. “I love you,” Steve whispers and Bucky touches their noses together. “God Stevie, I’ve always loved you. I always will.” 


End file.
